ABC news!

I recently interviewed with ABC news about my show and experience dealing with the SFPD. Here is the new clip that aired! http://abclocal.go.com/kgo/story?section=news/iteam&id=9101385

Thank you everyone for your support!

goodbye dream with G

Last night I had a vivid dream about G and me. I was performing my piece and G was with me at the performance. It was a sold out audience. Before I went on, Gabrielle said, "Heath, I don't think I will get another chance to teach, do you mind if I say a few words?"

"G, duh, of course, please." 

So G went on to teach my audience members about dancing and staying embodied. And then everyone started dancing and G pulled me aside and said, "Heath, I never got a chance to dance with you. Let's dance, k?" Her husband, Robert came over and interjected, "G, actually you have a flight to catch."

"Ok, Robert, then go pack my stuff, I am dancing with Heather."

And so we danced. We danced close and laughed. G kept saying, "touch me, like, touch me and let's do contact." 

"But G, I am going to crush you, look at you, you're so tiny!"

"Honey, that shit doesn't matter anymore."

So we did some contact and it felt so loving and maternal and warm. Her face was glowing and she kept laughing and smiling. Then she said, "baby, I gotta go now."

"Should I come with you?" I said.

"You can't. You got work to do, girlfriend."

I woke up this morning to an email from Lori that Gabrielle had passed away last night. I immediately texted Nilaya that I am sending her so much love and support. 

She texted me back, "Thanks girl. Now time to go rock the SHIT out of your piece!!" 

blow Gabrielle a kiss from me

I dropped Lori and Kathy off at the airport last Thursday on their way to say goodbye to G. I told them to blow Gabrielle a kiss goodbye from me. I was conflicted as to whether or not I should go to NYC to say goodbye. There are so many people already there who are so close to her and I've only known her for a summer so I decided to stay back and join the masses of people pouring in with love and support on G's FB page. There are 4,000 people who have joined already. The woman kicked some serious ass in her lifetime.

Heard from Nil

It's been a couple weeks since I last talked to G and my friends Lori and Kathy say it's not looking good for G. I don't want to believe it. I emailed Nilaya and heard back from her. She told me that, "the more I can do on my own now, the better." I am in disbelief about this.

I've also heard back from Gabrielle's close friend Ina Meibach, who has read the work G and I did. She told me that she found the work to be very moving and beautifully written but that it needed work theatrically speaking. She got the direction that Gabrielle was heading. She told me to send her a video of my performance and that she would be in touch if she had any ideas for directors. She warned me though, that because of the subject matter of my piece, and the fact that she worked mostly on Broadway, that she wasn't sure she would be able to come up with a good match for a director. I am just grateful for the call and her feedback. 

Inspector genius called back

I: "Hi Heather, this is the Inspector calling to follow up on your sexual assault kit. So your kit is still in the que down at the crime lab."
H: "The que? Are you kidding me? The que must be pretty big at this point since it's been 2 and a half years."
I: "Well it doesn't exactly work like you see on CSI. It takes a long time to process DNA and forensics and a lot of money and there are many, many cases that take priority over yours. For instance the Mission Street Rapist awhile back, he was actually breaking women's neck and injuring them. So here's what I suggest, go ahead and put in your e-calendar to call me back every 6 months to check up on the status of your case."
H: "How many rape kits do you think are at the SF crime lab at this point?"
I: " It's hard to tell, we don't have the best communications with the crime lab."

#WTFhappens@SFCRIMELAB

Talked to G today

I dropped my friend and teacher, Kathy Altman, off at the Oakland Airport today. She was heading off to Georgia to do a workshop. After pulling away I quickly pulled over again to take G's call. I updated her on my piece and the work that the documentarian in San Francisco wants to do in terms of touring HGR to young high school boys as an educational piece. G said that it sounded like a great idea and that she just needed a little more time to recover from the pneumonia and radiation that she had on her hips. I told her that the documentarian was hoping that we could have the piece staged by mid-late October. G said, "I can definitely get it done by then. Don't worry baby, I won't abandon you." She told me to read over my piece and memorize the first couple pages or whatever I felt most comfortable and certain on with the writing. I told her that I missed her and that she was SUCH a trooper and to hang in there and that I will be back to NYC as soon as she's feeling better. She told me about all the pain she's in and I could only keep repeating, "I am so so so sorry, G. You are a trooper. Hang in there. I love you, I love you, I love you. I hung up the phone and burst into tears. It's so unfair and fucked that she's going through this. Cancer blows.

SF General Medical Records and a sexist SFPD

Went and picked up my rape medical records today. It cost me $4 dollars. I read those 16 pages that told me all of injuries I sustained...injuries I didn't remember or had repressed...probably for the best. There was no mention of my toxicology report which confused me because I knew that I had blood drawn and a urine sample. My sexual assault nurse practitioner's number was on my records so I called her up. Shockingly, she answered. She explained to me that she wasn't surprised that my rape kit hadn't been processed because they are very expensive. She told me that if I wanted my toxicology reports that I had to go down to SFPD and get them from the crime lab.
I sat in my car after the conversation and went back and forth with myself as to whether I emotionally had it in me to return, yet again, to the sexual assault unit at the SF Superior Courthouse.
An hour later I sat in the waiting room at the Special Victims Unit. An Inspector came out 20 minutes later. I gave him my case number and he disappeared again for another 15. He came back here's the jist of our conversation:
Heather (H): So I am following up on my rape kit. It's been 2 and a half years now. When can I expect it to be processed? And if that is not possible then can I at least see my toxicology reports?
Inspector (I): Well, it looks like your case file is now in Iron Mountain. It's not accessible anymore. The status of your case is open/inactive.
H: Ok. but what about my toxicology reports? Can I at least get those from the crime lab?
I: Why do you want your toxicology reports?
H: To see what kind of drugs I was given?
I: Well, the likelihood of drugs showing up in your report is very slim. Basically the drugs leave your system the moment you wake up. And actually, alcohol is the more likely culprit for your blacking out...
H: But I only had two drinks.
I: Well, see, those two drinks, this is how we are trained to talk about this subject. See, you're a woman. Women metabolize alcohol differently because they are more hormonal, weigh less, have menstruation. Plus your metabolism would have changed if you ran the race that day. So while men... men could drink two drinks and steadily metabolize the alcohol the same way every time, women just don't. So it's more likely that you blacked out that day than anything else.

I left the SVU completely astounded at how medieval the SVU sex assault unit is in dealing with female rape victims. #WTF